week 14 recaps - fun with All-Stars

The standings got a good shuffle up this week, as Kyler dropped out of first place in Harmony for the first time this season and Dusty took a huge step in the wrong direction.


MTMTAS (71-83-14) 6
MBHB (90-70-8) 4
Tie 2 (R, 25; W, 6)

All Star Hunter Pence led Tylers team this week with a 417/440/542 slash to go along with 6 R and an RBI.  He got help from Andrelton Simmons (wait...he hits?) and his 458/480/542 4R 7 RBI 1 SB line.  Fellow AS Alex Gordon flirted with the Yanger Zone this week (105/190/158 1R).  For the Bastards, Jayson Werth (450/560/1000 7R 9RBI) and AS Paul Goldschmidt (500/560/909 5R 5RBI 1 SB) led the way and George Springer (3 SB) finally started running (though kinda stopped hitting) but Brian Dozier (185/214/296 3R 1 RBI) and Xander Bogaerts (100/143/100 1R 1RBI - Triple Bogey?) hurt the cause.  On the mound, Scott Kazmir struck out 15 over 2 starts for Tyler, who got solid Ks and ratios from each of his starters.  MBHB got a great Sunday start from King Felix (8K 2.25 ERA 0.50) in a no decision, but other than him, the starters werent so hot. 

I have been waiting for a reason to put in Andrelton Simmons GIFs.

I might not get this chance again so I am loading up.

Bob's Aters (97-62-9) 7
MWP Masters (73-89-6) 4
Tie 1 (W, 4)

The ATers offense was led by Dee Gordon (385/448/423 5R 0RBI 2SB).  That statement usually leds to lots and lots of losing, but not this week.  Gordon was joined by an Alex Rios sighting (300/300/433 3R 4RBI 1SB) and solid OBPs from Corey Dickerson (.391) and Edwin Encarnacion (.421).  Billy Hamilton's multiweek run amongst the league hitting leaders came to a screeching halt this week with a 160/160/320 1R 2RBI 1 SB line.  John both wanted Yadier Molina (450/542/500 2R 2RBI) and Ryan Zimmerman (524/560/714 4R 6RBI ) on this wall and needed them on this wall on his way to 4 hitting wins.  Chris Sale (1W 12K 1.00 ERA 0.67 WHIP 1QS) led Bob's staff to 5 pitching wins (1 tie).  Adam Wainwright (1W 1K (WTF?) 0.00 ERA 0.78 WHIP 1 QS) and Yordona  Ventura (1W 4K 1.08 ERA 0.96 WHIP 1 QS) joined in the solid effort.  John's staff struggled a bit, with only former Fastenal employee Shae Simmons (1W 2K 0.00 ERA 0.38 WHIP) turning in a great week.

Les Moles (72-90-6) 7
BySs (84-71-13) 4
Tie 1 (W, 5)

What is with every matchup ending with a tie in the pitching wins category?  Anyways, Tom won this week based on the fact that his offense didnt suck a huge wiener like Kyler's did.  Andrew McCutchen (458/500/833 4R 6RBI 1SB) and Ian "I have been wasting my talent all season by not playing baseball particularly well" Desmond (409/435/636 3R 7RBI 1SB) were spectacular, but the rest of the roster was merely decent.  Decent was good enough to win 5 hitting categories as Kyler's team failed to field a .300 hitter on the week.  The best was Yasiel Puig whose 267/290/467 slash left a lot to be desired, but did post 6R and 5RBI.  The $41 Votto hit 188/235/250 with 0R and 1 RBI and earned himself a demotion to the bench in favor of Justin Morneau.  Who thought that would be a sentence that someone typed in 2014 without any irony? Kyler's pitchers were as good as his hitters were bad.  Eight guys on the BySs staff posted WHIPs under 1.09 and ERAs under 2.40, led by Gerritt Cole (0.00 ERA, 0.40 WHIP) and Craig Kimbrel (0.00, 0.00) which led to wins in the ratio stats and SV/H.  Tom's volume got the better of the matchup in Ks and QS, led by David Price and Jake Arrieta who had 15K and 2 QS apiece.


ZAttack (87-72-9) 11
Dust Bunnies (84-77-7) 1

And BOOM goes the dynamite.  Just like that, Zach jumps into first and Dusty falls 14.5 games back.  This was the week when the Bunnies kept pitching like they have been, but stopped hitting almost entirely as a group.  Amongst the hitters, realy only Miguel Cabrera (261/400/565 8R 4RBI) and maybe Mike Trout (250/344/536) or Tulo (286/375/357) had halfway decent weeks for Dusty while Chris Davis (087/160/087 0R 1RBI) did his best to kill the Bunnies' ratios.  For the ZAttack, David Ortiz (412/500/647 1R 3RBI) and Nelson Cruz (345/406/655 5R 5RBI 2 SB) did enough to push 5 hitting categories to Zach.  On the mound, Zack had Kershaw continue to be Kershaw (1W 8K 0.00 ERA 0.38 WHIP 1 QS) and got a great Oakland debut from Sharknado Jeff Samardzija (1W 5K 1.29 ERA 0.71 WHIP 1 QS).  That was more than enough to overcome another Tiny Tim masterpiece (2W 12K 0.63 ERA 0.91 WHIP 1 QS) as Dusty's other starters were either ineffective or injured.


UCCMA (67-93-8) 5
Huckleberries (70-88-10) 5
Tie 2 (K, 42; QS, 5)

Kevin's hitting, led by Adam Jones (423/452/692 4R 5RBI 1SB), Robby Cano (333/429/583 6R 6RBI 2SB) and an abbreviated week from Victor Martinez (600/714/1200 2R 3RBI) thoroughly dominated Uncle Jimmy's guys in winning 5 of the hitting categories.  Uncle Jimmy was able to salvage the SB category thanks to a pair of swipes from Todd Frazier, and single swipes from TMGS, Carlos Gomez, Michael Brantley and Jean Segura (the only good thing Segura did this week).  On the mound, it was the exact opposite with UCCMA winning 4 categories and the teams splitting 2.  Jimmy was led by Max Scherzer (1W 7K 1.13 ERA 0.38WHIP 1 QS), the lone Padre All Star Tyson Ross (1W 9K 0.00 ERA 0.33 WHIP 1QS--you thought there would be a Padre All Star hitter didnt you?) and Angels on again off again closer Joe Smith (1W 2K 0.00 ERA 0.25 WHIP 3SV/H).  Kevin got a great week from Gio Gonzalez (1W 7K 0.00 ERA 0.63 WHIP 1 QS --quietly doing his best Kershaw impersonation with 22 straight scoreless innings) but couldnt overcome blow ups in his bullpen from Trevor Rosenthal (3K 15.43 ERA 3.00 WHIP 2 SV/H) and the recently traded Ernesto Frieri (1W 1K 33.75 ERA 6.00 WHIP).