Week 11- Highway to the Yanger Zone

Last week, we talked about the MartePartay becoming the first player to play a full week without getting a hit.  We had gone 10 weeks without seeing this phenomenon occur, yet this week we have another.  Yankee infielder Yangervis Solarte established a new low for futility as he took the collar this week, going 0 for 18 (he sat out Friday's game in Oakland and Monday's Yankee-KC game was postponed due to rain) with 1, Sunday afternoon, 9th inning walk as his lone bright spot for the week.  He finished the week with a 000/100/000 (he was also hit by a pitch on Monday; I dont count this as a bright spot because getting hit with baseballs is painful, regardless of where the hitting is taking place and who threw the ball) line.  Basically, the only way his week could have gotten worse would have been if he had starting murdering kittens as a sacrifice to get his hitting back after the hats for the bats didnt work and then he was arrested for animal cruelty while carrying a concealed weapon and signing "Fuck the Police."  And that wouldnt have been THAT much worse than what actually happened.  This type of epic suckitude will now be refered to as the Yanger Zone (sorry Uncle Jimmy).

Unless that's his sister, an MLBer can do better, son.

The craziest thing is that Yangervis was quite nearly not the only one who took the bagel this week.  Josh Donaldson has had some amazing weeks, but this week, he was a 4th inning, Sunday single away from finishing the week 000/000/000 (and making our collective heads explode; he finished a much better 042/042/042 - which I will now start calling "The Ron Kittle" even though I know it will likely never happen again).  He puncuated the stellar week by getting thrown out of the game Sunday for arguing a called third strike in the 7th inning.  Usually I get on players pretty good about complaining about balls and strikes, but the way his week went, I am sure it seemed like the strike zone was the size of the Hindenburg and no matter what happened he was going down in flames, so I will give him a pass for that.  I wont give him a pass for the haircut.  I have to draw the line somewhere.
They say that things come in threes.  I dont know who "they" are, but if this bagel thing is going to come in threes, one of us is in for some bad luck in the coming week.  My money is on one of the 7 starting hitters that I have (Paul Goldschmidt will never enter the Yanger Zone) because at times they have all been craptacular and I am facing Uncle Jimmy in a battle for the naming rights to our respective yet to be born third children.