Week 12 Waiver Wire / Remembering the greatest hitter of my lifetime

I had a bunch of ideas floating around in my head on what to do for the intro to this week's waiver wire, but none of the ideas seemed right in light of the passing of Tony Gwynn yesterday.  Not because they were in any way offensive to Gwynn or to dead people (or undead people, for that matter), but because it isnt often that we take time to remember or acknowledge someone who is the absolute best at what they do.  And make no mistake, Tony Gwynn was the absolute greatest batsman since Ted Williams hung up his cleats.  Even Frozen Head Ted thought so, and that is saying something considering that before meeting Gwynn, Williams thought that there were two types of hitters in the history of baseball - shitty ones and him.
There are all kinds of stories floating around the internet in the past couple of days talking about Gwynn's exploits (never struck out more than 40 times in a single season, which he did once.  His other season high was 35-- Ryan Howard and George Springer both struck out 36 times in May 2014.  He had 107 at bats against Greg Maddux in his career and hit .415 against him) and about how an entire generation remembers him as the pudgey, chubby guy who could slap singles the other way literrally at will but forgets the superb athlete that he was when he was coming out of San Diego State and that he stole 30+ bases 4 times including 56 in 1987.  Gwynn started playing for the Padres in 1982, shortly after I turned 1 year old, and he was a Padre, come hell or highwater (and it was often hell and highwater for those Padres) until he hung up his spikes just after I started my junior year of college.
So, before we get to waivers, I have my 2 favorite Tony Gwynn stories to share, feel free to skip down if you dont want to read them, but be warned, it makes you a heartless asshole.  The first involves a young Gwynn, a sophomore at SDSU who had decided the previous year to forgo playing baseball in college to focus on his basketball career (he was also a super stud point guard).  One of his buddies happened to be on the Aztec baseball team talked Gwynn into playing and then the SDSU head coach into giving him a tryout.  Gwynn ended up being a 2 time all WAC point guard and 2 time All American OF.  He is still the only WAC athlete to be All WAC in 2 different sports.  Pause for the awesomeness of being able to say "I was All WAC" and be completely serious.  He was drafted by both the Padres and the Clippers (then in San Diego).
The second involves Tony Gwynn hitting batting practice before some random Padres game at some point during his careers.  I love batting practice stories (Edgar Martinez used to take BP with 2 weighted bat donuts on his bat roughly 6" apart and still hit missle after missle.  Robin Yount used to try to hit the ball off the pitcher's screen hard enough to have it bounce back to the plate on a fly, which he would then try to hit out of the yard.  I heard that he was successful at least a couple of times), they always involve great players doing really crazy things.  This particular Gwynn story has him hitting 60 MPH pitches off a pitching machine.  Behind the machine there is a metal post with a cardboard box attached to the top, and a softball sized hole cut in the cardboard.  Another random Padre walks up to Gwynn and asks him what hes doing.  Gwynn replied, "Can you hit a fastball?"  "Of course" says random Padre.  "Can you hit a change up?" Random Padre replied, "Most of the time, why?"  Gwynn told him that he was practicing hitting a change up, and that he was going to hit them through the hole in the cardboard.  He then proceeded to hit the next pitch through the hole.  And the next one.  I have no idea if thats a true story, but I believe it because I saw Gwynn hit ball after ball exactly where he wanted to during games off of guys throwing 90+ with movement and changing speeds.  With the way that managers use pitchers ("Go out and throw 98+ for this inning, then you can pass it off"), and the way that Gwynn hit, I doubt that I will ever see another player with his hitting ability.  I know for you younger guys who have seen someone like Ichiro play, that may be hard to believe.  But for us old guys, there will never be a sweeter swing than Gwynn's (not even Griffey's).  It may not have always been the prettiest, but the balls always jumped off his bat.

SP Andrew Heaney - $3 - MBHB - Drop OF Brett Garnder
Heaney is the latest Marlins top prospect to come up to the Bigs.  The last couple (TMGS and Jose Fernandez) haven't worked out so poorly.  Heaney has great strikeout potential, excellent control and has dominated AA and AAA hitters so far this season.  He may not make "the leap" immediately, but he should be in the Majors for the rest of the season.

everybody clap your hands...

3b Todd Frazier - $3 - UCCMA - Drop RP/ass hDLe David Carpenter
Frazier has 6 SB and 15 HR, but somehow only 39 RBI (aka Alfonso Soriano Syndrome), but has been one of the best 3b in the NL so far this season.  Carpenter hit the DL today with whats being called vaginitis (or a sore shoulder).

1b/3b Lonnie Chisenhall - $2 BySs - Drop Deadweight Jhonny Peralta
Chisenhall has slowed down a bit since his epic 5 for 5 performance (which sent his bat to the Hall of Fame!) and he is 0 for his last 13.  That stretch has dropped his batting average to .365.  I am interested to see what Kyler does with him with Votto at 1b and Brewer Aramis Ramirez at 3b.  Something tells me that the Cardinals might be regretting the 4 year $53 million contract they gave him before the start of this season.  That $10 million salary in 2017 (the dollar figures for the contract vary by year) is going to look like a great bargain for a 35 year old shortstop who cant field and cant hit anymore...eek.

RP Shae Simmons - $2 - MWP Masters - Drop RP/pot head Chris Perez

Shae Simmons, former Fastenal employee

So, I have to admit, I have NO FUCKING CLUE who Shae Simmons is.  Tom also tried to pick him up this week so I can only assume that this is someone who used to work in the Fastenal IT department with Tom and John, but has gone all Dennis Quaid and made it to the Big Leagues despite being a 37 year old who never pitched in the minors. (ed note: No research was done into the actual background of Mr. Simmons).




RP Brad Zeigler - $1 - Les Moles - Drop SP/RP/walk machine Tony Cingrani
Too bad Tom didnt get his former co-worker, but he did get someone much, much, much better.  Zeigler throws like a frisbee golf player, but for some reason MLB hitters havent been able to figure him out over the course of his entire career.  Zeigler is a sure thing on the ratio stats, and will throw in the occasional hold.  Cingrani has all the potential in the world to be a top flight SP, but he is apparently a meat head and cannot find the strike zone to save his life.  Sorry Tom, I know I traded him to you (for Jose Reyes), I didnt think he would be this bad.

C Miguel Montero - $1 - MBHB - Drop C/cro-magnon Devin Mesoraco

Mesoraco has been great this year, and I wouldnt be surprised to see him picked up by some catcher needy team in the next couple of weeks, but his playing time has been driving me insane.  For some reason, the Reds keep trying to put Brayan Pena behind the dish at least 2 or 3 times a week.  There are few things more frustrating to me than checking my team and seeing the little "x" next to the game info for some player.  Mitsubishi Montero has returned to being a second teir fantasy catcher (like he was from 2009-2012) after a terrible 2013...and he has played in 66 of Arizona's 73 games.

RP (soon to be SP) Dylan Bundy - $1 - UCCMA - Drop 1b/of/heart throb Michael Cuddyer

I suppose the dropping of Cuddy was inevitable with the 6-8 week timeline on his return and Uncle Jimmy's DL spot currently housing Cliff Lee, but it still hurts.  I am all in on the 2014 Rockies, but I am starting to see the seeds of a breakup with the decision to put Cuddy at 3b and cost him 2 months.  Bundy (Al's 3rd cousin, twice removed) is yet another uber-prospect.  He is coming back from TJ surgery (who isn't?) and hasnt pitched since 2012, but he is at the point in his rehab where he is throwing in minor league games.  In his first start, he went 5 innings, gave up 1 run on 5 hits with 0 walks and 6 punchouts.  The talent is there if the arm is healthy.  If it is, Uncle Jimmy got himself a great, front of the rotation starting pitcher for less than a gordita.